When the Door Doesn’t Open: Outgrowing Spaces & Finding Your Own Way
There’s this weird thing that happens sometimes when you teach yoga — or work in wellness — or just exist in spaces that feel personal.
Sometimes it’s not the big rejections that sting the most.
It’s the little no’s.
The quiet ones.
The polite, kind, professional closed doors that still somehow manage to shake your confidence.
It happened to me recently — a studio I was really excited about ended up saying no.
It was completely respectful. Understandable. Professional.
And still — it sent me into a spiral I didn’t see coming.
The Thoughts That Showed Up (Maybe You Know Them Too)
→ Maybe I should’ve done more.
→ Maybe I waited too long or said the wrong thing.
→ Maybe I should have stayed more connected.
→ Maybe I let the wrong relationships fade.
→ Maybe I missed my chance.
→ Maybe I’m not enough.
Old stories.
Old patterns.
That ache of wanting to belong — to be chosen.
Truthfully? This isn’t a new feeling for me.
It’s just a familiar one, resurfacing in a new outfit.
There’ve been jobs that didn’t pan out.
Relationships where I was cheated on, others that unraveled without warning.
Friendships that faded for reasons I’ll never fully understand.
Each time, the sting isn’t just about what didn’t happen.
It’s about what it brings up underneath: the belief that maybe I wasn’t enough for it.
But Here’s What’s True (The Part Future Me Knows)
→ My love for this work hasn’t changed — but I have.
→ I’ve outgrown shrinking myself to fit into every room.
→ I’ve outgrown waiting for permission to take up space.
→ I’ve outgrown the version of me who needed external validation to feel worthy.
And maybe you have too.
If you’re in that in-between place — not quite where you used to be, not quite sure what’s next — I hope this reminds you of something:
You didn’t miss your chance.
You didn’t lose your magic.
You didn’t get left behind.
You’re being invited to build something that fits who you are now.
What to Do When You Feel Left Out or Overlooked
This isn’t just about teaching or business or content.
This is about reclaiming your sense of self — your voice, your vision, your why.
So when I feel like I’ve lost my footing, I return to this 5-step process. It’s a little ritual, a reset, a way to come back to myself:
Step 1: Move Your Body in a Way That Feels Like Power, Not Performance
This isn’t a cute yoga flow for Instagram.
This is music-up, hair-messy, body-coming-home-to-itself kind of movement.
Try:
Slow, gritty strength work
Myofascial release on your heart or hips
An angry walk with your favorite 2000s bangers
A 90s punk playlist stretch session
Lion’s breath until your throat feels clear
Let your body express what your mind is still processing.
Step 2: Write the Unfiltered Story You’re Telling Yourself
Not the polished version. Not the reframe. Just the raw truth.
“I feel left out. I feel behind. I feel like I missed my shot.
I feel like I should’ve stayed more connected.
I feel like nobody sees me.”
Let it be messy, dramatic, honest.
Then ask yourself:
What’s actually true?
What would future me say to this version of me?
Where is my power right now?
Step 3: Channel It Into Your Work
This is the content that always hits hardest — raw and real, but grounded in truth.
Some ideas to alchemize the ache:
“The rooms I no longer want to shrink myself to fit into”
“Not every no is rejection — some are redirection”
“To the version of me who thought this studio/offer/person would validate me: I see you, and we’re choosing differently now.”
The act of creating from clarity is healing in itself.
Step 4: Reconnect With Your Vision
Journaling prompts to help you come back to your own lane:
What do I want my work, business, or life to look like in 1 year?
What do I want people to feel when they experience what I offer/are in my presence?
What do I want to feel when I show up?
Where do I feel most like myself right now?
What am I so ready to leave behind?
What am I ready to claim more boldly?
You don’t need anyone to pick you.
You get to build the space that fits you.
Step 5: Take One Tiny Action Toward Future You
It doesn’t have to be big.
It just needs to be true.
Try:
Outlining something you’d love to create
Sending the email you’ve been avoiding
Reaching out to someone who inspires you
Decluttering a space that feels heavy
Journaling as your future self
Saying no to something that no longer aligns
This is your line-in-the-sand moment.
One small move with big energy behind it.
And if this is you?
If you’re floating between versions of yourself…
If you’re in the hallway between who you were and who you’re becoming…
If you’re building something slow, sacred, and deeply aligned…
I see you.
I’m with you.
And I’m right here doing it too.
You’re not behind.
You’re not being overlooked.
You’re just in the space between shedding and becoming.
Want more support like this?
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→ Come to our summer retreat if you’re craving space to reconnect in real life.
→ Or just bookmark this post and come back next time the spiral hits.
